If anyone reads this...it is not about you.

Poetic Emesis

They tell you in school that you need to know who, what, why, where, when and how. It's not as easy as Ms Plum in the library with the candlestick. Life sucks sometimes. And it is never easy, never clear, never sensible.

There are times in life:
when you just want to live through this one minute.
when you want a moment to last forever.
when your innocence is lost.
when you realize that what you thought was innocence was just stupidity.
when you wonder what happy is....really is.
when all you want to do is sit in the corner and cry --- but you can't cry.
when you can't stop crying no matter what you do.
when something that is absolutely perfect turns out to be completely wrong for no apparent reason.
when you don't know who to trust, and you don't know if anyone should trust you.
when you are a really good friend, and other times you are a really bad friend.
when people you never thought would leave are suddenly gone.
when you are no where near where you thought you would be/should be.
when you have to give up everything - and let go.
when you really wonder if there is a bottom of the pit and why you can't just hit it already.
when life surprises you - truly surprises you.
when you should keep your mouth SHUT.
when you should scream at the top of your lungs about the injustices in the world.
Life does not tell you the difference.

There are things in life that are just wrong, evil, unexplainable and cruel - cancer and AIDS are two of these things.

There are things in life that are beautiful, pristine, and unexplainable - rain on a tin roof, friends who won't leave despite how much you push them away, the trust of a pet, unconditional love (though so very rare).

So, where does this leave us? Remember -- who, what, why, when, where and how. Answer these questions, and you will still not understand.

Just live. Remember - this is just poetic puke.